


Throwing Rocks at the Stars

by n_u_t_m_e_g



Series: Night Vale Ficbits [3]
Category: Welcome to Night Vale, wtnv
Genre: Angst, Bad Things Happen To Carlos, Carlos does not react to death well, Carlos has a breakdown, Carlos is not used to how often people die in Night Vale, Cecil Is a Good Boyfriend, Cecil teaches him, Loss of time, M/M, a somewhat happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-10-13
Packaged: 2017-12-29 06:18:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1001997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/n_u_t_m_e_g/pseuds/n_u_t_m_e_g
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carlos has never reacted well to death, especially at high rates. Cecil helps to the best of his ability.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Throwing Rocks at the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta'd.

Carlos lost a couple of days.  
Sometimes, even after he became accustomed to Night Vale's indescribability, something would set him off. It could be anything; a wall with eyes or maybe it could be a missing house or person. But it would happen.  
Carlos remembered Tuesday. But he did not remember Wednesday or Thursday or Friday or Saturday.  
He was sitting in his lab when he received a text that one of his trainee scientists had died in the field.  
Things kind of became a huge blur from there. It felt a little bit like he was sleeping. It also felt like a panic attack. Then it felt like he was dying. Carlos was pretty sure he was screaming, there for a while. Then he thought he was crying.  
Carlos's throat was raw and his phone was ringing and ringing and ringing, but he couldn't stop, because Jon was dead and Night Vale was a monster and he couldn't-  
Then it was Sunday. The sun was setting and Cecil was in front of him and Carlos didn't know when Cecil had gotten there, but Cecil had this panic on his face that scared Carlos down to his core and Cecil had his hands on either side of his face, his eyes wide.  
"Cecil-" A wave of relief washed down Cecil's face.  
"You haven't spoken in three days, Carlos, I didn't know what to do, Carlos, never do that to me again, please!" Cecil was crying, he was nearly screaming; there was a horrible concoction of fear and anger and pain and concern on Cecil's face and the tears were dripping off of his chin and he was trembling.  
"You need to stop, Carlos! You need to stop throwing rocks at the stars, trying to knock them down. You can't change Night Vale, you can't stop people from dying! You're scaring me, Carlos, please..."  
"Jon is dead."  
"I know, Carlos," Cecil said, brushing a hand through his hair. Cecil's eyes were bloodshot and there were dark bruises under his eyes and Carlos realized Cecil had been here since this started, since Carlos didn't return his calls.  
"I know it's hard to lose an intern. It hurts and it's horrible. I know every name and employee number of every intern that has died under my care. It hurts, Carlos, but death is a part of life, there's no story without an end and Carlos, you can't let yourself be broken like this every time-"  
"How do you do it?" His voice was hoarse and it finally sunk in that it was  _Sunday_ and Jon died on Tuesday.  
"I survive," Cecil said, his voice quieting from the shrill near-shriek it had been before. "I wait to hurt until I can no longer hold it in anymore. Then I wipe my eyes and start all over again."   
"Cecil, I'm sorry..." Carlos said, and Cecil crushed him in a hug, running his hands across Carlos's shoulders and bunching them in the front of his labcoat.   
"You can't stop people from dying, Carlos," Cecil repeated, though it was muffled slightly by the fabric of Carlos's labcoat. "You can't. People die. They just  _do_. You can't let it hurt you like this. You have to have a tough skin."  
Carlos nodded and closed his eyes.   
"It will take me a while to get used to."  
Cecil nodded in return.   
"Just... call me next time, please. I never thought you were going to respond to me."  
"I'm so sorry, Cecil."  
"Don't apologize," Cecil kissed him once, quickly. "And I'm so sorry for your intern."  
"I am too."  
Cecil made him tea and stayed over for a fourth night.   
Carlos did call, the next time. Things went far smoother.


End file.
